O say, can you be serious?


So, let me get this straight. At an NFL game, taking a knee during the national anthem in order to call attention to systemic social injustice is disrespectful to the American flag? But, during an NFL game, using American flags as sparklers to guide a parade of fictional villain soldiers (named after German WWI stormtroopers)—using the flag as a gimmick to sell movie tickets—that is respectful?

Okay. Just wanted to be sure...   

The Abominable Snowflake


This past Sunday, VP Mike Pence partook in some pretty overt political theater. In Trump's ongoing production of The Manbabyian Candidate, Pence was willingly cast as the delicate flower who gets the vapours whenever he sees a non-conforming black man. During the national anthem, the vice president feigned an insensitivity to black people calling attention to social injustice, threw a hissy fit, and used it all as an excuse to not watch football with the general public. As reported by CNN, prior to the veep's protest protestation, a pool of journalists (I would have called it a jalopy of journalists) that had been following Pence before the game were told by a Pence staffer to stay outside of the stadium, as "there may be an early departure from the game." Upon hearing that the whole incident was staged, a local resident (as well as the entire population of Earth) was overheard saying, "No s**t it was staged!"

Rumor has it that, early next year, you'll be able to catch the VP in his Gilbert and Sullivan-inspired one man show, The Pirates of Pence-is-an-Ass. Next month, live at the White House, Pence will be reprising his role as Judd in an all-bigot production of Oklahomophobia!

BONUS: some other titles of Trump productions coming soon to definitely-not-Broadway:

  • Hello, Donny!
  • Legally Bald
  • Hairsplay
  • Bye Bye Birther
  • Wicked
  • (I Saw) Oliver (Backstage at the Beauty Pageant)
  • The Book of No More Mexicans
  • The Lying King

The Emperor's New Wall

According to the White House, the guy who's currently the head of the US wants to build a see-through border wall:

One of the things with the wall is you need transparency... As horrible as it sounds, when they throw the large sacks of drugs over, and if you have people on the other side of the wall, you don't see them, they hit you on the head with 60 pounds of stuff? It's over. As crazy as that sounds, you need transparency through that wall. But we have some incredible designs.

So, it sounds like pretty soon we're going to be in an Emperor's New Wall type of situation. "Of course there's actually a wall, I build the best transparent walls! This wall is 70-feet tall, trust me, I know walls. I, Donald Trump, single-handedly just solved the epidemic of flying Mexican border drugs!"

This is what we've learned today: the source of all of America's drug problems is Mexicans hurling 60-lb sacks of "stuff" over the border, one at a time. Building a regular, un-see-through wall along the border will not ameliorate the situation. Build a transparent wall: America = great again!

I just hope that once this transparent "wall" is built, Trump flies all his Cabinet members there to mime being stuck behind it, all the while fawning, "oooo... such an honour to be behind your wall, Mr. President. You're such a good wall builder!"


US gov dabbles in science censorship

Last week, three USGS scientists coauthored a study about how much more coastal flooding there will be in the near future due to climate change-induced sea level rise.

But according to the usgs.gov news release, the authors published a study about how much more coastal flooding there will be in the near future due to the nature of time going forward.

That is not a very subtle difference. But hey, maybe the governmental press releasers just didn't realize that the underlying cause of the flooding will be climate change?

Nope! The Washington Post is reporting that, when reviewing the governmental press release, the authors were asked to delete the sentence, "Global climate change drives sea-level rise, increasing the frequency of coastal flooding." You know, the whole premise of the entire study.

It's like when I wrote a review of Raiders of the Lost Ark and Harrison Ford told me I wasn't allowed to mention that they had lost the Ark, or that it was raided by raiders, or that climate change is real.

NOTE: I find it frightfully adorable (but more frightful than adorable) how the Trump administration thinks that if government departments are no longer putting out news releases with the term "climate change", and that .gov websites are no longer allowed to have "climate change" written on them, that the public will forget that climate change is real... Side note: Climate change is real.